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Bullfight Metaphor - Play or pray with anger without causing or taking injury.
The cartoonish image of a bull fight is that of a toreador waving a red cape in front of a bull as an example of deliberately playing with another’s anger. Some people enjoy calmly dodging angry remarks in a conversation where others try to take no notice of the anger or act as if they are not affected by it. Whether we use the red cape method or choose not to acknowledge it, anger will still be present and affecting everyone present.
Anger is a strong emotion, capable of stimulating energy for good actions or those that are destructive. Either way, anger causes disturbance within us that deserves our conscious attention so we might discover the likely causes and not just ignore our feelings. By reflecting, we might be enabled to choose wisely whether to engage in a form of play with someone who is angry or seek healing for oneself and all who are involved in the specific incident.
Those who can play with anger are also usually adept at recognizing whether another’s anger is about something serious or only about a strong personal belief or preference. If the latter, they may have sufficient experience to bring out the humor in the self-will of the angry person, and to point out the absence of real injustice. But if the other’s anger is related to something that needs healing, then it is better by far to show acceptance of the anger without becoming involved in it, or else seek for a positive interaction with whoever is angry so that nothing truly hurtful takes place.
Few of us enjoy being in the presence of anger, but like a strong weather event, it is a reality we had best consider when it occurs. We can consciously develop our basic attitudes about relating to someone who is angry, and we can sometimes prepare ourselves for situations in which we are liable to encounter such behavior. By reflecting on past experiences and recalling our own feelings, we learn that we usually suffer discomfort, not harm, and may determine some ways of safely avoiding escalation of the anger or of confronting angry behavior in a manner that matches fully with our own beliefs and values.
Our bullfight metaphor can easily and helpfully be extended into our personal spirituality because anger does not of itself preclude love. Though all of us may become angry when our will is not being done, we also become angry when we witness injustice, and not just to those we know, but also children, those who cannot defend themselves, and all who suffer bullying of any kind. This anger, stemming from love, often gives us the power, if not to the waving of a red flag, then to trustingly bring ourselves and those involved into the presence of God in our prayer. This is not play, it is healing.
Last Updated 1/24/2026