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Lone and Lonely - An alternative is always available to us.

It would be difficult to imagine using “lonely” in a positive context. Rather, the word seems to begin with the idea that “lone” is not a truly constructive human condition even though the efforts of lone individuals are often quite rightly praised. We know that each of us has been raised in, and has been supported and influenced by, many people and communities. We have grown and developed as unique people who act as individuals in ways for which we are solely responsible, but we might want to think more deeply about whether we do so as completely lone agents.

Much of our activity is clearly communal, as when we engage in a conversation with one person or with many people. We act as individuals when we think, compose text, ponder whatever we see or hear, and when we close our eyes to sleep. Yet, at every moment, we are in the unseen presence of love that moves in and through every one of our human activities. We may not have any consciousness of our essential connection with being loved, but we live ultimately because we are loved, first by God, but then by others as well. Whether we advert to this truth or not, it is love that enables us to act, perhaps some of it arising from sources we have never considered before but might now choose to quietly admit into our awareness.

If we have feelings of loneliness, we usually desire companionship, and not just any kind, but that of true care for us. Some of us might think that only living people with whom we can be present physically, or by some means of communication, will suffice to alleviate our distress. Others have found that in prayer to unseen God, and in recalling loving relationships with family and friends including some who have died, the feelings of loneliness diminish, and other feelings and other thoughts enter that help move our focus from self to gratitude for all that we have received.

The prevalent culture around us promotes the idea of individual rights without much regard for the common good, which is the real source and support without which lone individuals would have no rights at all. Another way of describing how over-emphasis on the idea of individuality is self-injurious is our experience of gratitude. Will we thank ourselves for being who we are? Rather, when we choose to look through our past to the great variety of good, caring people, inspiring examples of some public figures, and the ways people have influenced us, our hearts are touched by the peace-giving experience of gratitude.

No more emphasis on loneliness or a sense of being a lone person going through life. Instead, we know that we are loved, and so, we love.

Last Updated 9/12/2026